Translated by Shashi Martynova

Passover, 2025

on this day we walked once more on the ocean floor for a thousand years and more on the ocean floor. we had nothing but hope on which to stand hope in You and in this land and each time we think we’ve arrived at last we need so little and here we came at last that strip of land slips through slips past quietly slips from us once more to the left a wall of water to the right the same we don’t look up there are no stars or guiding flame only a pillar of fire as a memo of ruin and pain lighting the hills and orchard lanes step and beneath your foot you’ll feel earth another step and again here comes more earth what with that each step costs habitual death but it’s only death You rise in every soldier in every war in all newborns all crust in every wine poured in each who prays near the Wailing Wall’s core in this land and it’s everlasting sore may You rise again as You did before may the burned return to before ashes of war and death may those who cry out to You return from the depth.

Х Х Х

what’s left to launch orange balloons to name streets after to quote a farewell letter endlessly to line up along the many-kilometer road to lay out poems that draw tears little pictures like Klimt’s and of course photovideos videophotophotovideophotovideo… and then it works like this the archetypal image mother and child madonna a jewish woman well now she’s no longer ours everyone thinks so the world so to speak sympathizes selectively based on general humanistic values or so-called national identity we're the ones from the joke we must be protected they’ll finish us off then go for the rest no one will rise again no matter how many balloons are sent no one will return except at a terrible cost and even that will never be enough enough time to breathe the best we can do there is no other never was never will be

X X X

they promised a tsunami now it’s with us so calmly no sea rose, no wave heaved there’s nothing but grief not only the loss of these small children but the deaths of them all of women with hollowed wombs of those who never came home those broken limping screaming at night all of it is inside me no one to curse no one to blame but I can’t unsee it all the same tears at the bottom like wellwater no air remains breathe I say just breathe look at the stream beneath at the mountain strange yet yours in snow at the people who don’t know their friends beneath the flag of white not lifting it not even holding tight and you among them still alive and there not only empty air.

Demeter

I don’t know how it happened she was breaking into dance danced vanished into the dark and I lost her I was screaming where are you I screamed answer me I screamed no way my girl my baby all my joy and light I screamed at god who are you at all no one moves nothing stirs no one nothing greedy earth I curse you indifferent people the last wheat ears nothing will grow and nothing will bloom until she returns no fruit will ripen not in the womb not in trees I know she’s a prisoner down there in the dark she forgot how to laugh can’t speak a word if she’s alive at all shut up madwoman I tell myself she’s alive of course she’s alive keephowlingkeep howlingkeephowling and don’t lose hope not for a breath not for a blink of an eye sometimes I wake — and I see her by my side can’t believe it I’m happy there she is the mangled earth blooms again I laugh I cook I dance I rejoice in her until someone says — here we go again another episode call the team let’s lock her up till the meds kick in and she comes back for a while to reality.

X X X

is there a world after auschwitz is there a world after bucha is there a world after kibbutz re'im is there a world after gaza’s tunnels is there a world after raped three-year-olds after those burned alive in cars after those drowned in the blast at the power station after one-year-old amputees after the ones screaming in bombed-out homes until they stop after those who lost their entire families after the ones who died without medicine and water after the ones buried wherever it was possible or not buried at all we have to stop no the remaining world the so-called normal one answers yes a beautiful world filled with peace watches the almond trees bloom attends plays and exhibitions prepares books for publishing keeps breedingandbreedingandbreeding does not see the evil writes about it expresses outrage helps refugees sends packages for the righteous cause and does not see the evil thinks evil will pass them by hopes evil will pass them by truly believes evil will pass them by and why exactly and I think the same hope keep faith I don’t know why I know why some small flame still flickers some kind of light breaks through I try to protect it otherwise I’m worth nothing.

From the cycle “Says the Platoon Commander”

7.

You think the war is over? not a damn bit not for me not for people like me I step outside fists clenched like there’s a grenade in them I walk so the wall’s at my back never turn my back to anyone I look at people maybe this one has a knife maybe this one will blow up himself and the rest do I have a medkitwaterphone and everything starts to blur and the heat and one part of my head says you’re sick this is just a street people are all around and the other part mocks what if any minute it all shifts and suddenly you’re in it in horror it’s in you your throat dries up heart pounding deafening like in the war we were entering enemy territory night cold we were boiling I sat with my back to traffic in the truck at least to shield something it wasn’t even a tank you were completely exposed so loud we couldn’t hear each other Shootingshootingshooting in all directions with no direction someone jumped first into the dark fell into a pit right next to the wheel they shoot from down there dig in that’s how we lost the first one and how many after I believe no peaceful picture now they’re here now they’re gone instantly in war it’s clear don’t relax even for a second same now the rest is made up closing eyes that blindness is how it all happened how it keeps happening.

8.